no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
