I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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