dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize