What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I currently don't understand fingers.
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