According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
