We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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