eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
