Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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