Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Randomize
