i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
