You really coming over, don't trick.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
