I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
