Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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