I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
