drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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