I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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