I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Blood and glitter go together right?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
