I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize