Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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