This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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