my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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