okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
