That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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