They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize