shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
