That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
