turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
