Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
