Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize