I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
