The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
