Umm I'm too high to move.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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