Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
True college students do jello shots in the library
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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