DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
