We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
