He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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