Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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