I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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