I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize