I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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