When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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