just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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