C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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