Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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