now i know why i became what i already was.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
