he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
