he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
