i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
