I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
