Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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