problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
